Yesterday was a difficult day, I felt awful, was really let down by my Doctors and I honestly wept all day. I felt like all of my hope got sucked out of me and I had no answers, no treatment options and was being left to rot. Going to the doctors always drains me... I can go for months feeling pretty positive about my future and my situation, then I walk into the doctors office and I feel like a small child laying all of my emotions out on the table and placing my future in this persons hands.
I don't blame the doctors because my illnesses aren't well known, therefore there isn't many options for them to help us. All they can really do is listen, and let us down gently about the lack of options. They say things like; "I'm afraid sometimes we never get to the bottom of these things" and "You might grow out of it", which trust me are not comforting words when you have been sick for years.
Now who is going to change this? It's not just me, there is millions of us suffering behind closed doors. I feel we are a forgotten or ignored community. On Instagram we have a whole world, there are loads of us, all working together to get answers, to improve. All striving for the same thing- Health.
When we are online, we are an army. We are important, we are known and we are cared for. In the real world, nobody knows we are struggling.
How can there be so many of us, yet our illnesses are still a mystery. We still have to FIGHT to be believed.
So who is this up to? Who is going to fight for us, if not us?
It is up to us.
We need to get our illnesses recognised, we need people to know they hurt.
We need people to hear our screams, watch us struggle
So that one day people like us will go to the doctors, they will know what's wrong, know what to do and perhaps even have an answer.